The Disciple Whom Jesus Loved

by Fr. Dismas Sayre, OP

Some Scripture scholars are, I believe, a little too clever and overthink things a bit too much. Scripture scholars often do great work, and find little, wonderful details, literary and historical, that would be easy to miss for most of us, myself included.

But too often, they act as if they are getting paid by the word, or are compelled to find something “controversial,” because it is far, far easier to get published this way in our modern world, and one gets research grants for finding something new, not for agreeing with previous scholars.

Which leads me to good ol’ St. John the Apostle, whom I, and tradition in general, identify as synonymous with St. John the Evangelist, and whom we will celebrate during the upcoming Octave of Christmas. Critiques of the authorship of the Gospel of St. John often center on this mysterious “beloved disciple” that appears later in that Gospel, beginning at the Last Supper (John 13:23). So who is this? Is this a real person, or is it some kind of literary device, or is it actually St. John? I think if we immerse ourselves in the Gospel, Epistles of St. John, and Revelation, we see a very real coherence of a man who experienced most intimately the mystery of Christ, from the Last Supper, through the Crucifixion while standing with the Blessed Mother at her side, and then, finally, experiencing the mystery of the Resurrection. And is it not strange that St. John the Apostle, one of the three most important apostles, who witnessed with his brother St. James, and the prince of apostles, St. Peter, the Transfiguration, who ran with St. Peter to the tomb, is not here at all? Where is he?

He has stepped back. This is not uncommon in Scripture. St. Thomas Aquinas tells us, “This was John the Evangelist who wrote his Gospel. He wrote of himself in the third person to avoid boasting" (“Commentary on John,” St. Thomas Aquinas, 1803). Obviously, it would seem obnoxious to the reader and ourselves for him to call himself directly, “Our Lord’s Most Favorite and Beloved Disciple EVER!” But I propose that this is not the point. So why did Jesus love him the most of the ragtag band of twelve? Aquinas then proposes:

[I]t is enough to say that John was more loved by Christ for three reasons. First, because of the cleanliness of his purity: for he was a virgin when chosen by the Lord, and always remained so: he who loves purity of heart, and whose speech is gracious, will have the king as his friend (Prov 22:11). Second, because of the depth of his wisdom, for he saw further into the secrets of God than others; and so he is compared to an eagle, a wise servant has the king’s favor (Prov 14:35). Third, because of the great intensity of his love for Christ: I love those who love me (Prov 8:17). (Ibid, 1804)

Throughout the beginning of his Gospel, St. John is a silent observer. He was not there for the Annunciation, nor was he there for the Nativity. He is a witness of the signs Jesus performs, and these signs point to Who Jesus is. He is inviting the reader, “Look! See? That’s what I saw. It’s not important who I am, what’s important is THE Great I AM, who is Christ! It’s Him, in the flesh!” And through his contemplation, perhaps the greatest contemplation among the Apostles, he alone among the Apostles, witnesses the Crucifixion. He is observing everything, carefully, imitating the Blessed Virgin Mary, with whom he stood at the foot of the Cross, and while the emotion was raw at that moment, still, I believe that just like Our Blessed Mother, he treasured all these things, pondering them in his heart (cf. Luke 2:19 for Mary). In Mary, St. John sees a kindred soul, and while he may not be sinless (he says some foolish things in the Gospels), still, he is pure of heart, and undivided of heart for Our Lord. He saw the mystery of the Love of God made flesh, then willingly taking up the Cross, and then dying for sinful man. Perhaps this is why Our Lady is given to St. John at the foot of the Cross — because he was the most like her among the Apostles.

When St. John writes about the beginning of Our Lord’s public ministry, the Evangelist is careful in praising St. John the Baptist, the man sent by God, who was not THE Light, but who witnessed to the Light, that he might bear witness to the Light (cf. John 1:6-8). Now a new John, not the Baptist, but the Apostle will enter the scene, and he is now witnessing to the Light in his Gospel, inviting the reader, to see and witness the Lamb of God, as he himself did. “Don’t look at me,” St. John the Apostle says, “Look at HIM!”

And by not naming himself, I think he invites the reader as well to enter into the Mystery. St. John the Baptist, as the Precursor, had a singular and unique mission. But a disciple that Jesus loves? Now there is room for more than one here, in a sense. You too can be a disciple whom Jesus loves! “Stand in my place, perhaps not as one of the Twelve Apostles, but as this disciple whom Jesus loves!” is what I believe he leads us to ponder.

How do we do that? We do that by having that same willingness to step aside and let Jesus take, not the wheel, but center stage. We do that by standing with Our Blessed Mother for the length of our days, and inviting her into our homes, and yes, that most intimate of homes, our heart. By standing with her, the Image and Mother of the Church, that same Church, that great hospital of sinners, for whom Jesus gave up His life.

Be faithful, be as pure of heart, of as much as an undivided heart as you can bear in your state of life, and enter into that same contemplative spirit which Our Lady and St. John possessed, and that we enter into as we meditate on the Mysteries of the Life, Ministry, Death, and Resurrection of Our Lord in Our Lady’s Rosary.

BE THAT DISCIPLE!

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